What About Now?

"Successful people maintain a positive focus in life no matter what is going on around them. They stay focused on their past successes rather than their past failures, and on the next action steps they need to take to get them closer to the fulfillment of their goals rather than all the other distractions that life presents to them."

-Jack Canfield

     I work an 8-5 job that pays me well to do what I love. I'm excelling in a Master's program that will let me do even more of what I love. I'm getting married in a few months to the love of my life. I have a family and friends that are a constant source of love and support. I have so much good in my life. Why do I hate myself?

     This is the dialogue that constantly goes through my head, and I am probably not alone. It is so easy for those with mental illness to lose focus and dwell on the negative. We can plan out step by step what we need to do for the day, then think, "But what about that embarrassing thing that happened yesterday?" We dwell on those little mistakes, and they eventually grow into depression, self-hatred, and even suicidal thoughts. We lose track of our accomplishments, and we even stop acknowledging them. We lose our focus, and sometimes it seems impossible to get it back. 

     There is hope. I don't necessarily agree with the quote. I don't think success is just given to those who remain focused. I think it is given to those who can get that focus back. In order to get that focus back, I think we need get used to bragging about ourselves. We dwell on what's wrong so much, but dwelling on what's right for an hour or so is not the major crime we sometimes think it is. That way, we can stop worrying about past mistakes or possible future mistakes. We can focus on the present. So, when you find your mind wandering to things you wish you did differently, ask yourself, "What about now?"

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