SPARC is dedicated to preventing suicide by expanding community collaborative, identifying new effective strategies in prevention, implementing prevention projects and practices, and educating our community about suicide prevention. The goal is to reduce the number of deaths by suicide.

If you are experiencing a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, contact the National Suicide Lifeline at 1 (800) 273-TALK (8255) or the Kern County Mental Health Hotline at 1 (800) 991-5272.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

A Relationship Built on Understanding

"One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood."

-Lucius Annaeus Seneca

     One of the most important human desires is to be understood. We long to have someone understand what we are going through. We want to feel supported more than we want someone to fix things for us. This is especially true when someone has thoughts of suicide. Understanding the person's situation is much more important than "fixing" it. 


    I believe there is a correlation between friendship and understanding. Friendships are strengthened through understanding. The more someone understands you, the more likely you are to be that person's friend and be close to that friend. However, the opposite is also true. If we want to be understood, we have to take time to understand others. That involves taking time to truly comprehend what a person is saying and reflecting back what they say. By doing that, the person will feel closer to you, and maybe be willing to reciprocate the same level of understanding. 

    Having close relationships with other people is a key aspect of both suicide intervention and prevention. The closer you are with someone, the more likely you are to tell them what you are feeling. Also, they will be more likely to help if that friendship is built on mutual understanding. Therefore, surround yourself with people who understand you and try reciprocating the service yourself. Feeling understood is one of the best feelings we can feel for ourselves. 

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